Free Write

  Youth Member Guidebook (Mini Edition)

EARLIER TODAY---I sent an email to all of my committee members in regards to an idea that has been on my mind for awhile and wanted to get their input. I legitimately wished there had been a youth member guidebook created for not only me, but future youth members who might consider or think about applying to be on USILC. It would have been nice for me to have something I could refer back to if I needed some answers to questions about what my leadership role is on the council and everything else in between. You get the idea here??? I am really excited to know what other members of my committee think about making this happen as we move along with stuff into the future. I truly love this committee with all of my heart & soul which if you ask me is nothing short of an understatement. It has given me opportunities to learn and grow into the disability leader, self advocate, mentor and friend that I want to be for others across the state of Utah. (Please stay tuned for more updates on this later!!!)

Ninja Presentation Update: (Date Change)

I'm excited to announce that my presentation with a colleague of mine has been set in place and I am not so prepared for this to unfold. I know it will bring back lots of mixed emotions in my heart as I walk back onto a campus where my self advocacy journey began and can only hope for an unforgettable experience that is going to leave a mark on this world. I genuinely hope we can make a good impression and have a very heartfelt review from everybody in hopes to return back for future NINJA conferences!!! :) 

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Hilary Weeks - Keep Going

It's been an emotional rollercoaster for me to get here and not hide away from what is in my heart. I am grateful for the peace of mind this beautiful song and others have given me, when life was almost a little too unbearable to deal with and relearning lessons on a daily basis. It's obviously not been easy for me to lash out my feelings and not take the time to listen to what is being said... which is something I can make lots of improvements on everyday. I need to keep on going and not pretending to be someone that I'm not meant to be in this world--which sometimes is harder than you would think. I have never felt like this an issue that my heart needs to learn from and understand a little more, that will give me a peace of mind & not worrying about what others think. It has gotten harder for me to see the clearer picture of things here and yet I know is just a little bump in the road, that all of us come across at one time or another. I am so grateful for the opportunities that I have to keep on going and not taking what I do not know as close to heart as I have done way too many times in the past. This mistake of mine is one that I am confident is going to change my perspective on so many things and recognizing why it is so important to not have control over what other people are doing. It has given me a lot of reasons to understand why things in everyday life have to continue happening and keeping my mouth quiet as much as I can possible. I am grateful for the forgiveness that my Savior, Jesus Christ has for me and no matter what mistakes that I have made throughout my lifetime--He's always forgiven and loved me for who I am in his eyes. I love him so much and would not be the person I am today if it not had been for his example. He has allowed me chances to be someone who tries everyday to do better and not affront to what could have happened instead of the other way around.

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Mini Break

When I created this blog of mine six years ago---I only had a legitimate goal to write up 279 posts in honor of my favorite television sitcom, "The Big Bang Theory." However, I have been able to overly succeed the limited amount of posts I wanted to share with you all and it has become such an amazing experience for me. I have loved being able to share what is in my heart and getting my message clearly across to people about who I am without trying to impress or draw attention to myself. It's given me so much more perspective in some way I can make improvements with my writing abilities and with four hundred posts later--not making anymore posts until I am in a much better place.

LONG STORY SHORT---My anxiety has again taken over me in ways that I can only hope is slightly temporary and not an forever ride of mixed emotions. It has been extremely hard for me to pretend like this battle of mine is not a real thing that everybody struggles with and yet I have not kept this hidden off anymore. I am not sure if my heart needs me to do this in order to recognize how much of a stronger young women I am or if I am just simply too lazy to blog about stuff on here. Who knows??? 

I didn't legitimately realize that sharing experiences from "A Dancer's Life" would lead me into making this choice but I am not ready to continue blogging until my mental health is taken care of. I am grateful for my friends---who have stuck with me through an experience that I know is an never ending battle, but one that I know I am not the only person who struggles with this on a daily basis--but my inner thoughts need to recuperate themselves a little bit. (This is not necessarily a permanent decision by any means, but one that I have just really needed for some time now and I could not think of a more perfect time to unwind from blogging for what will only be a short period--not a lengthy one unless it needs be.)

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Mini Stories

BYUWBB Team:

Wishing you ladies all the best as you enter into the NCAA basketball tournament this weekend!! I know you girls are going to put it all out there on the court as you prepare for what I hope will be an amazingly unforgettable experience!! I'd love for you all to know that regardless of whatever the end outcome is, keep in mind that each one of you is incredible and that you gave it a hundred and twenty percent. I look forward to cheering you ladies on from my home and hoping it all turns out well :) I cannot wait to watch you all bring home the title that is on the line this year and can only hope that even if you do not win--all of you are still winners!!! #GoLadyCougars #iBleedBlue 

Volunteering Presentation (Saturday Afternoon)

Once again I have an opportunity this weekend to present on a topic that means a lot to me and one of my colleagues on the speakers network. I am excited for the chance to share about my experiences with being a volunteer in my community and giving back to others without anything in return. I only hope that both of us will make a good impression on everybody who will be participating with us and touch their hearts in some way or another. 

Ninja Planning Committee (Unofficial News)

It's certainly going to be sentimental for me as I participate on this committee again and give it a hundred and fifty percent. I am definitely not prepared for the unexpected tears of gratitude and love that will fall down my cheeks as I make sure this conference ends up successful. I am grateful for this conference and everything it has done for me the past ten years, which if you ask me is nothing close to an understatement. (Stay tuned for more updates!!!)

Ninja Update

Official Presentation Date (June 21, 2022)

I'm so excited that me and one of my colleagues selected a date for us to present on self determination, for the tenth annual NINJA youth leadership conference!!! This holds such a special place in my heart, simply because it is where my self advocacy journey began and if I end up coming off a little sentimental prior to the session--it is just because I love this disability conference so much. It will be such a rewarding experience for me to teach once again and in hopes this presentation gets well received-- from everybody who will be participating with us. I am not certain when I will ever get a chance to teach at something like this again in the distant future, but I will never pass up an opportunity if there ever will be another one!!! 

Minus all of the heartache that I have in regards to not being a mentor, I can wholeheartedly admit there is no end in sight for me to stop advocating for individuals with disabilities and when I am ready for to live on my own-- I will certainly write up about it. I am not particularly sure if that will be happening any time soon and yet I still have a lot of work to do before that chapter of my life begins. I am grateful for the incredible opportunities this conference provided me over the years and look forward to more chances with improving my leadership skills, among everything else in between.

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YLC Update (USILC Report)

As being chair of the best disability committee ever, I have an opportunity to give a little brief update to USILC about our previous ninja alumni call and what kind of activity we planned, etc. I did not even hesitate in replying back right away and wanting to give myself a chance in hopes to make a good impression on all the important people who will be listening. Please stay tuned for an update on this later!!! :)

Serving in this leadership position has changed my life so much and can hardly believe things will end before too much longer. It has been such an amazing experience for me to learn and grow into the self advocate, disability leader, mentor and friend that I need to be in this world. I am truly grateful for this opportunity of getting to stretch myself in ways I never imagined possible and continuing to learn as I tread along this experience called life. I have loved getting to see myself realize how important it is to maintain boundaries with people in this field of independent living and trying my hardest to perform-- everything to the best of my ability from here on out.

Self Advocacy Conference (June 2022)

This event will be taken place online and in person within a few months :) I am grateful for the privilege that I have to continue showcasing my leadership skills to others in the disability community. I have really enjoyed getting to be a part of this planning process and once this conference all unfolds right in front of me, it will definitely come into full circle. I am grateful for the incredible people who make this experience such an amazing one and I can only hope to continue being a part of more events in the distant future. Please stay tuned for more updates to come at a later time!! 

(To Be Continued)

Special Tribute

My good friend Josh would have celebrated his twenty ninth birthday today and instead I am here writing up a blog post about him. He was truly one of the best people you would have ever met and he always just kept a smile on his face, no matter the circumstances that he was faced up against. I'm grateful for his true legacy of making the best in every situation and not worrying about what others think--which if you must know is a lesson that I could learn for myself. I hope that you are having the most unforgettable heavenly birthday ever with everyone on the other side!!! :)

I am so grateful for the opportunity that I had to know Josh and his contagious positive attitude, made you feel a little better than when you walked into a room. He made me feel good about myself as an advocate, mentor, friend and disability leader who wants nothing more than to see our world be a more inclusive and wonderful place. He never failed to make you laugh or smile whenever you needed it the most and it never ceased to amaze me with how he wanted to live everyday with a chance to keep going. 

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