Heartfelt Tribute

EARLIER THIS MONTH--- My good friend Josh was called back to his heavenly home and did not even know that he dealt with any health issues whatsoever. His positive energy and smile lit up about any room he would roll into on his electric wheelchair... but you shouldn't ever think of that as just an absolute understatement. It has literally given me reasons to seeing every problem in life with a much more different outlook and perspective instead of being swallowed in doubts all the time. 

As I reflect back on this past year and a half... It has not been one of the easiest or happiest times for me. I have really learned so much about learning to persevere through anything that life throws at us and continuing to influence others for the better of mankind. I have certainly missed all of the many laughs we shared together and enjoyed being around someone who didn't ever once complain about his trials in life or anything that was placed in front of him. 

With this being the one year anniversary since his mission was completed-- I have never felt so much more of an ability to look for the good in what life has to offer. Josh didn't want to leave this world in a way that would not remind us about how to strive harder each day to be like our Savior, Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father. 

Josh,

Thank you so much for not only being an incredible example and friend to me, but also seeing your life through the eyes of our Savior, Jesus Christ everyday. You never ceased to amaze me with all of the positive vibes you shared among your friends and making each moment one to never forget. You have definitely motivated me to see the good in everything that life has to offer and understanding we don't ever have to face our trials alone. Thank you so much for reminding all of us: "It's okay... Just keep swimming!!" Life will never continue to get easier as I think about my experiences with trying whatever I can to persevere with a smile on my face and remembering that I can do hard things. We miss you so much and cannot wait to see your smiling face again in heaven!!! Hope you are finding many people to teach the restored gospel of Jesus Christ to and letting them know about what's truly important to not only us but everyone else in this world. 

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Over these past couple of weeks, I have neglected to receive information about whether or not I will be heading back to the neighborhood elementary school this year. It has been extremely difficult for me not being over at a place that feels like a second home and making a teacher's life easier in some way. 

I am not particularly certain if this has much to do with the difficult experiences that happened last year at all whatsoever. I am confident there might be some hesitation about stuff-- but there is not a reason for me not being there due to what the previous school year made me feel like at the end. It's been one of the most unusual experiences ever and not knowing what could happen down this road- has left me with being not needed or forgotten about. I am completely feeling like maybe there isn't much for me to help out with anymore this year and even though I greatly miss all of those kiddos-- life has not been the same for me. #iMissYouSoMuchThirdGrade

Girls Retreat - Park City, Utah

I have definitely long awaited for this event to take place and cannot wait to get away from the stress that life has continuously given me. I am more than looking forward to a weekend with lots of laughs, stories to tell, memories that I can positively know will last into the eternities!!! I have always wanted to go up to the National Ability Center in Park City and cannot wait to see it in person with all of the most amazing people ever!!! 

Farewell

TWELVE YEARS AGO YESTERDAY---- The first pilot episode of my favorite television sitcom was aired on the CBS network and can hardly believe it is not returning for a brand new season. It's been obvious that I'm not a legitimate nerd whatsoever and would easily care less about reading thru comic books of well known super heroes. 

In honor of this legitimate television show... I watched multiple clips of random episodes on that well known site called You Tube yesterday and felt a little bit of nostalgia. I definitely miss not being able to look forward to any new episodes this year and if I can admit---I will forever have a special place in my heart for those characters. 

As an individual with a learning disability-- I may not have related to much of what the story lines in this show were about from a normal standpoint, but I can truthfully admit it made me realize that just being different is a lot cooler than most people would think. It's been several months from when I did watch the most heartfelt series finale ever and could not help but have tears running down my face as I listened to Sheldon's speech after him and his wife received the Nobel Prize!!! 

With all of the many things I've posted about this sitcom----I know my life has never been the same and can only hope for whatever is to come later down the road. It has definitely left a slight hole into my heart since the show concluded in May of this year and I feel incredibly grateful for what this has done for not only me, but lots of other people as well. I really loved all of these extraordinary people so much and even though we have never met each other in person, I want them to know in my way-- I love you all too!!! Thank you so much for giving me and millions of fans across the globe, some of the best laughs ever during your twelve year run!! #MissYouAllSoMuch #ForeverBigBangTheory.

Solution

After the last previous school year ended, I made one of the hardest decisions ever about being a little more stickler to keep my distance from someone and giving each other some space. It's truly not the easiest thing for me whatsoever, but there is no perfectly good reason that I can't see if this will end up working out. I am certainly more than determined to notice if anything else happens between now and when I return back to the elementary school at some point in time... that I can handle myself with no tears rolling down my face.


If you didn't check out some of my older blog posts about this experience in my life, I would not suggest that you read through it unless there is something you want to take away from them. I know as a self advocate in this world, telling my mom about how much I didn't want to see myself volunteer in any classroom with having made the biggest mistake of my life and not enjoyed a second of it. I couldn't even begin to describe what an absolute trial of my faith this was for me & getting my voice heard throughout is something I feel lucky to use whenever it is needed. I will never step inside of any classroom again left with mixed emotions and frustration that consistently wore off on me!! It will never happen as I move on from this unfathomable chapter and in hopes for a brighter/successful year ahead. #MorePowerToHer. 

NEXT MONTH--- will be the one year mark since my good friend Josh was unexpectedly called to his heavenly home. I know that his impression on me will never be forgotten and realizing what an absolute difficult past year it has been for me to not have him around--- does not ever fail to give me a push in the right direction whenever I need it the most. I am so grateful with having a testimony of the gospel in my life more than anything else in this world and knowing that my friend Josh is where he's needed most and cannot wait to greet him with open arms!!! #ItsOkayJustKeepSwimming

Girls Retreat

OVER THE WEEKEND---One of my favorite people in the whole world contacted me about doing a presentation for their upcoming girls retreat in a few weeks!!! I am excited for this new opportunity of being able to share my message about girls and women with disabilities to believe in themselves-- but even more importantly to try out new things. I cannot wait to have a little mini getaway from all of the stresses that life has to offer and being able to escape into another place, is most likely what I need to refocus myself a little bit. I've decided to keep this a secret from my best friend who has no idea that I'll be headed up to their way as a guest speaker and thanks to their legitimate youth coordinator, I'm more than capable with keeping my mouth shut. I am confident there will be a little bit of tears when it comes around to my turn with getting up in front of people and giving them a reason to know they have nothing to hide about being who we are. I know it has never been easy to feel like at times, if I could only have an explanation for the ups and downs life continuously gives me on a regular basis- especially with the roller coaster I had to face this last year. 

Another part of my life that I'll share in my message with these young ladies, involves with me being in a member of the Speakers Network. I have enjoyed getting to learn so many new skills and gaining the confidence to enjoy presenting on various topics like: Internet Safety, Self Advocacy, Healthy Meals, Self Determination, Work Incentives, etc. I know for me as a self advocate, leader and friend to everyone that no matter the circumstances of what is going on in life, you can impact this world through your actions and the way you continue to have your voice heard. It has never been a part of my life until about this last year when things were falling into pieces and did not much of an idea with how to tackle any kind of situation unless I spoke up and made sure it would never happen again. I really hope more than anything in this world, some of these young ladies can feel inspired to reach themselves out in the community and leave an imprint on someone's heart. I am so thrilled with having been asked to do this for someone who is almost like a second mom to me and never fails to put a smile on my face, whenever I need it the most. 



It is certainly going to be a very much needed trip for me to put my life in order and have a little bit of fun with some of the most amazing people I know!!! I am a little too stoked for all the many fun late night stories I can share with my peeps & not talking about that sugar coat marshmallow candies if you ask me!! I have literally wanted an experience like this to come up at some point in time and can hardly even believe it will be here sooner than I think. I am probably more than just anxious to see how this entire little getaway turns out for me & it is most likely going to be one of the most memorable times ever...with a little bit of sparkle just added to it. 

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Special Needs Ballroom Event 2019:

My older sister created this unforgettable event almost a decade ago & cannot even imagine what my life would be like without it. I have continuously learned to understand for myself about how much of a joy it was for her to dance ballroom and making new friends while at it. It's almost surreal for me to think about how quickly time has come and gone from when this only began with a dozen people, but has continued to become a highlight of an event for so many spectators. I am grateful to have shown up the first day this event began and little did I know what an amazing part of my life, it would soon become down the road. 

Not Back To School . . . Yet

I am determined more than ever with heading into this new school year, that every minute of it will be one that can either start off with a BANG or just simply be another chance for me to learn some new skills from the teachers I will get to work alongside with. I do know more than ever with all of the unfathomable situations I had last year, I am confident in not making that decision again any time soon. It has always been difficult for me in the beginning of each new school year, in not being there to meet my new kiddos for the first time-- but I am hopeful it will be a lot more relaxed, stress free and have a lot more adventures/stories to share!!! 

Summer Break Continues - Part One

With all of the excitement and craziness in my life, I still have a lot of summer vacation where most of what I'd want to do is not gonna happen. Laugh Out Loud---I have a lot of new adventures in my life I am hopeful will either take place for me or simply give me a different chance in making sure I have my message shared with the rest of the world. I am not particularly certain what else this time in my life has for me down the road, but I am never gonna stop making my voice heard and not trying to draw attention from people. I know there is a lot more for me to learn and take away from all of those times I kept wondering if any moment could lift my spirits, but also show myself that I can do pretty much about whatever I set my mind to!!!

National Pageant

It's difficult for me to put into words, what an incredible and life changing experience it was to attend this event as well as meeting lots of participants from across the United States. I definitely gave it my all in each phase of competition and trying to leave a mark that is not meant to be forgotten any time soon... but you know what I mean?!?! I really liked getting to learn as much as I could about what it means to be a good self advocate and making sure that my voice is heard. Despite not having walked away with the National title this year, I am grateful to have been a part of this event and hopefully did make a good impression with each opportunity that I had to share my message. 

Shout Out:

Jordan,

I may have never gotten the opportunity to talk with you personally this last weekend, but thank you so much for having an idea and making an impact on the lives of girls/women with disabilities. I am grateful to have had a small part into what this event is really about and I cannot say this enough, but you are truly the epitome of what Miss Amazing is with no doubt in my mind. I may not know all of the many things you needed to do in making this program come to life, but it is definitely something that I hope continues to grow as the years keep passing by. 

Aside from the many nerves and excitement I had in this competition, I will have to admit that even though it was a lot to take in a very short period of time-- I know this is going down to be one of the most amazing experiences that I know will stick with me. I look forward with being able to continue on with my reign and making more of a difference in the lives of other people around me, in anyway that I can possible. There are only so many more opportunities for me to leave behind a legacy of all the many things I was able to do and hopefully let those with disabilities know, that we are not alone and in this experience together.