Small Break

NINJA Alumni Call (Avoided)

I usually love being on these calls with my friends that I rarely ever see on a consistent basis, and then all of the sudden not knowing how much it would effect me-- is a different story for a separate time. It was a very difficult moment for me trying to look brave, when I was legitimately shaken up through out what I had originally assisted in putting together. I felt completely neglected with not having a chance to speak- let alone not feeling like a part of the group itself was painful for me and realizing when I had my sound off along with my camera blackened-- I realized that maybe it would be easier if I trooped through all of the activity without having said a word. 

Self Care Week (Shortened Version)

This entire week itself is gonna be dedicated for me to being more sorely focused on what I need to do, in order to feel mentally healthy again. It was very difficult for me to not break down into tears with all that was going on and feeling like an outsider who was looking in from the window. I received a missed call from one of my colleagues who was on the activity tonight and giving me a heartfelt apology for having not given me a chance to speak when I wanted to. It does not clearly matter anymore and with all of that being said-- I will try to keep up with blogging as much as I can (while trying to take breaks so I am just able to help myself feel better.) 

Grateful List (Mini Version)

I am so grateful for my NINJA friends who continue to lift each other up during any time that may not seem necessary whatsoever and giving me advice when I need to hear it most. 

I am grateful for my favorite bunny ever (Curtis) who continues to put a smile on my face and overall warming my heart when I see him on Zoom Calls.

I am so grateful for the opportunities that life has given me this new year and even though it has been at times really difficult to keep those professional boundaries--I need to do my best in making sure I don't cross the line.